Compassionate Acceptance

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 Glenn Bigonet, M.A.

Mental Health Counselor

Certified EFT Couples Therapist

 

617-462-6642

gbigonet@icloud.com

           

 

Couples Counseling

 

Why Choose Couples Counseling?

Couples often decide to seek couples counseling when their relationship is no longer working.  Often miscommunications and pent-up tensions and upsets get in the way of the love that they used to feel and they just don't know how to come back to a place of love with each other.  Sometimes there is an issue between them that they just cannot find a resolution for. Other times there has been an affair or some other violation of trust that has left them feeling like the relationship is broken.

Goals of Couples Counseling

The overall goal of couples counseling is to find solutions that are truly a win-win and that help bring the couple back to the honeymoon stage of relationship.  This often includes helping each partner learn to stand strong as an individual and still be loving and supportive of their partner.  At the same time they learn how to hold each other in their relationship and still give each other the freedom to live their lives and to be themselves.  In some cases what is best for the couple is to transition the relationship from one that is romantic to a friendship.  In these cases the goal is to help the couple make this transition with minimal animosity.

My Approach to Couples Counseling

As a certified EFT (Emotionally Focussed Therapy) couples therapist I focus on the communication patterns in the relationship during periods of distress. In moments when we feel hurt, scared or have unmet needs we often respond in ways that create greater disconnection and discord instead of the connection and resolution we are looking for. By diving into and looking in depth at these hurtful patterns and what fuels them, we are able to step out of the disharmony and tension and create new patterns that create peace and greater connection.

This process is one of creating understanding that takes away blame. The more I have learned about human behavior the more I have learned that there are good reasons for all of our reactions. This process is about understanding those reasons, to make sense of our reactions that may not make sense to ourselves or our partner. Once we make sense of each others behaviors, couples are much more able to work together with compassion and understanding.

EFT is the only clinically documented form of couples counseling. Research studies find that 70-75% of couples move from distress to recovery and approximately 90% show significant improvements. Through this proven process I can guide you from relational distress to connection that is joyful for both of you.

In cases where there has been an affair or another violation of trust I start with helping the couple resolve and heal the wounds around the violation and then help them rebuild their relationship so that they are able feel safe and connected again.

Copyright © 2018   Glenn Bigonet, M.A.
Photo of Couple Miramisska | Dreamstime.com