Compassionate Acceptance


 Glenn Bigonet, M.A.

Mental Health Counselor

Certified EFT  Therapist





Trauma/Abuse Counseling


Effects of Trauma and Abuse

Trauma or abuse occurring at anytime during our lives often has long lasting effects that can prevent us from reaching our full potential and from experiencing life as joyfully as we would have if the trauma or abuse had never occurred.  As a result of their trauma and abuse histories many people experience greater amounts of:

Some experience frequent and/or intense nightmares or flashbacks or other symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.   Many people develop self-harmful and/or addictive behaviors as a way to cope with their often overwhelming feelings.  It is also common for survivors to recreate their abuse or traumatic episodes with other people.  Such retraumatizations reinforce and/or deepen the level of trauma symptoms.

Why are Some People Traumatized By an Event and Others Are Not?

All people during their lives go through or witness horrible events and yet two people can experience the same event and one can come through it okay and the other is traumatized. Why it that? Over the past 30 years researchers have been asking that very question. The answer they've come up with is simple. Those who experience traumatic reactions after an event do so because they have the experience of being alone in the pain of the event in some way. As human beings we are designed to heal in connection with each other. When there is no one there for us in the way we are needing, then we get emotionally stuck in the horrible event and experience traumatic effects.

Counseling Can Be Retraumatizing

Often trauma and abuse survivors enter into counseling trying to heal and find that the counseling retraumatizes them.  This often happens when the counselor has the client directly deal with the trauma before the client has the emotional skills to deal with it or at a pace that is too fast and overwhelms the client.  The emotions associated with abuse and trauma are typically very intense and if you do not have the skills to manage such strong emotions, participating in any activity that triggers those emotions can be retraumatizing and cause greater harm. 

My Approach to Keeping Treatment Safe

In the early stages of treatment we therefore want to avoid going into the details of trauma or abuse.  Instead we focus on managing your emotions in the moment as they come up for you.  This includes developing skills to manage your reactions to the trauma and abuse so that they no longer disempower you.  Once you have gained good skills at managing your emotional reactions in the present, then you can begin to carefully address and heal the wounds of the past at a pace that is effective but not overwhelming 

Most importantly I will be fully present with you and your reactions to your trauma. I will help you understand why you are experiencing what you're going through and I will be there with you to reshape how you respond to what happened to you. In essence, I will make sure that you no longer feel alone in your pain around your trauma. That in itself is the most healing part of the process.

Copyright © 2018   Glenn Bigonet, M.A.